“… our kids don’t listen to us…”, this is a phrase which I have heard a number of times and a problem which every other parent feels to be connected with. And as a reply to this phrase, my question is “Do we listen to our kids?”.
Listening and obeying is what we expect from our kids. But before expecting anything from them, we should be ready to deliver. Deliver what is expected from us. Most of the time when kids say something to us, we tend to ignore them as either we are busy or whatever they are saying must be irrelevant. But believe me, whatever your kids are saying is of utmost importance to them.
Listening to the kids is not just hearing, it is much more than that. It is a mutual blend of your body language, facial expressions and to top it all, eye contact. We must be sure to establish eye contact with a child when he/she is speaking to us. We should do this by respectfully bringing our eyes to the same level of the child. We should not look down at the child or merely bend at the waist, as this can be intimidating. We must bend our knees and lower our body so that we are on the same or closer level as the child. By this way, we are not merely establishing eye contact, but using our whole body to communicate a respectful presence and relationship with the child’s body. This courtesy extends to the child that what they are saying is important to us. At Little Leaders Play School, all the educators are trained to make deliberate eye contact with the learners, and then invite them to participate in an activity.
By listening properly to the kids, we can make our kids feel that they are important to us and that we do care for them. Inherently, we are teaching them the proper way of listening and thus, communicating.
Make sure that the child establishes eye contact whenever he is saying something. “Look into my eyes”, should be said to them often. By doing this, you will teach them the critical link between communication and focus.it will makes the learner confident as well and adds on to his/her personality.
Also, as they say “the eyes are the reflection of the soul”, by making eye contact you are teaching your kids from a very early age that you trust them and they can trust you. This also boosts their self-confidence and their inner strength.
Once your kids are sure that you listen to them every time they have a say, things will reciprocate and they surely will listen to you.